#it feels like christmas or my birthday
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gmm is back in 4K, who cheered!!!
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#rhett and link#good mythical morning#good mythical summer#AHHHH#so happy they're back#and in high quality???#they're even prettier#i'm gonna be insufferable#wow#also Stevie calling them boys again#it feels like christmas or my birthday#lol#i don't even know if tumblr can handle 4k screenshots but whatever lol#my post
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I think Dick and Jason would have multiple āwhat the actual fuck are you saying right nowā with Tim and Damian when it comes to quality of life/monetary differences. Sure, Dick and Jason got used to Bruceās āis $100 a good enough tip on a $30 bill?ā shit, but hearing Tim talking about a new laptop he bought for $5000 literally is like a punch in the gut.
If they ever went on a cruise (which they totally wouldnāt because cruises are floating death traps), Jason and Dick would be in awe of the fancy amenities, where as Damian would be unsatisfied with the quality, since he grew up with every single amenity known to man. Tim would just feel like itās all normal since the Drakeās were extravagant and travelled all over the planet.
Jason : My bedroom is bigger than my fucking apartment.
Dick : I could do a full gymnastics routine with the space in my room.
Tim :
Dick :
Tim : My room is normal sizedā¦
Jason : You grew up in a mega mansion. I hardly think youāre the benchmark of a normal room-
Damian : I must agree with Drake. This room is frankly underwhelming.
Dick, staring wildly at him : What do you mean underwhelming- Dames thereās an aquarium wall in your room.
Damian : Yes. Underwhelming.
Jason :
Dick :
Jason : Do you want to-
Dick : Jump off the boat? Yes.
#batfam#batman#dc comics#dcu#jason todd#comics#dick grayson#batbros#tim drake#damian wayne#bruce wayne#headcanon#i have a friend who is super mega rich and has a butler and shit#and she just couldnāt comprehend that I didnāt have an allowance as a kid#and that i had to wait for my birthday or christmas to get stuff#sheās one of my favorite people but she really has no concept of money#itās really funny tbh#i feel like thatās how tim is. just wouldnāt get it#not damian though. he just doesnāt give a shit.#heļæ½ļæ½ļæ½d just steal whatever he wanted tbh
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anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...
#not a shitpost#serious post#ask to tag#tw trauma#cptsd#c-ptsd#and if so we should TALK about it#because it means there are a whole group of survivors out there whose mental health regularly worsens during holidays#like i know i am most certainly not the only person who feels an undefined Dread hanging over christmas/my birthday/july 4 etc#bc too many shitty things happened during those times and now my brain is hypervigilant bc traditionally these are the Danger Times#and this seems like it would be particularly common for survivors of abusive/dysfunctional households (aka most people with c-ptsd)#because holidays/vacations typically mean 1) the whole family is together/being forced to interact#2) and undergoing external stressors e.g. travel/relatives aka 'outsiders' visiting/routines & coping mechanisms being interrupted etc#3) there is social pressure for this to be a Fun Family Bonding Experience which only highlights the cracks in the foundation#and exposes the common Everything Is Fine/We Are A Happy Family lie#4) the cognitive dissonance of feeling tired/anxious/stressed/afraid during a time when you are 'supposed' to be Making Good Memories#and then everyone is angry/tired/anxious/triggered and things boil over and something or someone goes Very Wrong#weird that i'm posting this in october when halloween is...sort of the ONLY holiday i have only good and happy feelings towards#i got lucky there#also i have positive feelings towards Labor Day but that's for socialist reasons
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The classic outfit is coming with the Lake House DLC for Deluxe Edition owners! Massive layers of clothes and elbow patches will get a comeback! I'm so excited about this. I love the brown suit, but less formal Alan with long hair and beard? Oh my lord
#alan wake 2#alan wake#remedy entertainment#lake house#Lake house DLC#This feels like birthday and Christmas on the same day. And my bday already is in December.
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what do we think?
#sometimes i feel like i shouldn't be allowed to have access to editing software#today is no such day#so... christmas/birthday present for myself?#dan and phil#phan#no but seriously imagine it#nbsii#dnp#mcr#my chemical romance#fob#fall out boy#tumblr
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its 4am, my entire body aches something severe and i cannot sleep because of it, and i cannot tell if this is just because of the cold or something when i have heating pads and arson or if i possibly caught something sickly while air traveling two days ago
the entire skeleton feels like it's achey but oh my god my lower back and legs
#it feels like a slightly less intensive version of when i had covid that took away my ability to walk for a while#which makes me think if its something sickly then it could be a cold or flu and ill be fine in a week prob#or shorter which i can handle#i can be sick for christmas but if im sick for friend birthday im showing up in a hazmat suit LKGDGDSLG#sara shush#medical
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#gif#why do I have to spend every christmas and every birthday alone#for what am I being punished#I am a good person#and I donāt think this suffering has any sense#itās just that in life the happy people have good things coming their way#and the sad people always just get more trauma#I know I could have a relationship if I didnāt have such a traumatic childhood#my trauma lets me reject the good guys and waste my time with the aholes#but i donāt know what to do about it#every nice guy I met absolutely wasnāt attractive to me#and we also didnāt have anything in common#so Iām not even regretting rejecting them cause it wouldnāt have worked out#and they deserve someone who actually fancies them#i just wonder why I never met a nice guy that I have common interests with#or who matched my preferences lookwise#it really feels like Iām simply not allowed to ever meet the right person#and gotten to the point where I swipe for hours have a lot of matches and then ghost everyone#as I just know it either will be someone nice but not attractive to me or an ahole#I just donāt have any energy left anymore#I just want to experience love so bad but canāt do these dates anymore#Iām so so tired
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You ever stay up until 1 am cutting out pictures of your current comfort character to make a collage so that you can forget you know how to feel?
Yeah me neither
#starlords.grief#gravity falls#stanford pines#stanford#ford pines#pines twins#billford#the book of bill#im gonna get the third journal for my birthday...#and then the book of bill for christmas :)#stanford helps me cope#stanley pines#coping coping coping#i miss her so much#im in so much emotional pain right now i feel like im gona be sick#save me stanford save me
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sure my comms are closed for now but yknow what? some christmas hinadam just 4 you anyways anon (just in time for gundhams birthday too lmao hbd king š) so consider these a freebie šš¼
#all i read was christmas hinadam and i popped off LMAO the worms will never leave at this rate#hinadam#sdr2#gundham tanaka#hajime hinata#danganronpa#GUNDHAM TANAKA MY SCRUNKLY HAPPY BIRTHDAY! :))) YAY!#ari art#ask draw#hhhngnghgh i didnt HAVE to draw the chibis yknow.... but i couldnt help myself tee hee!#tho i feel like you cant really see some of the smaller details/lines...sweats#also if you cant read the text then just open in new tab yadda yadda#ALRIGHT BUT FR i gotta stop making ask doodles for now i still gotta finish the six chars meme thing and also its almost christmas EEEEEEEK#gundhamronpa
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I. will not. buy stupid shit. with my next paycheck. even if it has a 25% off coupon.
#the last thing I need is another blanket. like. I specifically told my family pls do not buy my blankets#for Christmas/my birthday this year. I have. so many blankets. and I'm literally OUT of room to store them.#and this is AFTER I've gotten additional storage stuff to go WITH the built in shelves in my closet#but. this..... I want a kitty pocket. I feel like Santino would love it in the winter#erin explains it all
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irt the lrb what would you say if i said liam & noel spent new years 2023 together in paris
what would you say if i said liam bought the house in france (the one with noel's name carved into the walls) in march 2023 and that month noel talked about wanting to spend several months in paris
which could mean nothing
#just making guesses chatting shit talking bollocks you know how it is#if anyone can debunk that first thing pls tell me!#feel like i'm wearing a tinfoil hat and it doesn't vibe with my outfits if y'know what i mean#feel like i should do a timeline but every time i try it gets out of hand#ok have some very messy puzzle piecing:#liam & noel texting/calling from time to time since jan 2020#noel splits w sara spring 2022 starts spending more time in manchester#maybe march mothers day something happened?? possibly liam & noel met up in april??? that's pure speculation though#pretty boy released oct 31 2022 noel stops wearing wedding ring#noel spends christmas in england for the first time in ages#liam listens to the smiths all christmas eve. on christmas he has a party for close friends and family (including bod)#liam and debbie go to france for the new year to house hunt#liam claims on twitter (no one believes him) that noel is with him on new years day#(((he posts a selfie that i uhhh got very tinhatty about.. don't worry about it)))#noel goes to a football game on jan 5 and he is in a very good mood#divorce news jan 14. liam's divorce playlist jan 15. allegedly out drinking together jan 16. noel does promo for new single jan 17#jan 18th liam claims on twitter noel wants to meet up#peggy's 80th birthday end of jan#liam's hip surgery beginning of feb#feb 6th he claims noel's ācoming over later to wipe my arse and change the bedding he's a good lad reallyā#starts slagging noel off for real again in early march (he'd been āniceā since november's pretty boy promo)#news that he bought a house in france#noel does a bunch of promo at the end of march (when the 3rd single came out) some of which didnt air until june when the album came out#there's one interview where he seems very tired and hungover and he blabs about paris for ages#end of march is the 1st time he tells liam to call him. 2 months later he asks (goads) liam again a bunch of times#anyway i probably forgot some liam tweets from jan/feb and i really haven't looked into 2022 or 2021 yet#but yeah it's pretty clear they were hanging out šļøšļø jan 2023 and then things soured by march after liam's surgery#(((kinda wonder if noel ghosted him and then was too scared to call))) āwondering that bc it's exactly what i would've done :/#the christmas eve/day stuff probably means nothing btw but well i'm feeling insane about the new years stuff don't even worry about it
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Ok I don't think it's unreasonable to refuse to visit my parents if they're not going to hang out with me,, right?? RIGHT?? Like I shouldn't be expected to drive 2 hours there and back to sit around their house and beg like a damn puppy for crumbs of their attention like I did when I was a kid, especially when I have a whole ass apartment and cat and schoolwork to take care of at home.
"am I going to see you this weekend?"
"I wasn't planning on it. I can fit it in if I'm not just going to be sitting around your house all day though"
"I'm not going to entertain you!! š"
Ok well, I'm a guest now since you turned my old bedroom into your hoarding closet I mean sewing den mb,,. idk sounds like bad host manners to me. š¤·
#Like I love my mom I really do#I hate her sometimes too but MOSTLY mostly I just pity her#I forgave her a long time ago and she's done a lot of work and healing to make sure our relationship has been relatively stable#Not enough tho obviously lol#Anyway I'm willing to hangout with her fr!! I would come over and do stuff with her no problem!! I would even enjoy it#But I'm not!! I'm not going to go home so I can relive my childhood emotional neglect trauma for 6 hours !!#Just so she can feel less lonely while she sits and plays games on her iPad!!#Especially when I don't even have my own space to retreat to when I get frustrated being ignored for the 15th time in a row!!#There's a reason I spent Christmas and my birthday alone
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#there is this inherent horrible horrible guilt to me when it comes to money#I can not buy something for me. I Have to convince myself it is for something productive#or it will be used by my family or used with my friends#it cant just be for me for nothing or its all for naught#and i dont know how to explain this to people#i really really dont#because then sometimes people will offer to get something for me but thats almost worse#because then it shifts from the guilt of wasting money on yourself for nothing. a solid 65/100 on the guilt scale#to wasting *someone elses* money on myself for nothing which is an easy 80 or so on the guilt scale and is only worse if it costs more#like see.#its easy when its like christmas because so long as you are about equivelent in money or I am doing more than the other it is good and righ#but as soon as the scale tips there is something horrible in my chest like ive done some great wrong to be righted#you know?#I dont know its just#i feel so strange trynig to ever expalin it all so i just . dont#I just try to circumnavigate it#like like#if i can just pay them back overtime it works out perfect#a lot of times i get really really narvous about this to a weird degree and i genuinely dont know how to get out of it#because when its like way over into the red with someone the last time i got so stressed I started sweating like I was running#and i was breathing weird and feeling lightheaded so i layed down on the ground and just stayed there for a while#sorry to Justice and Charles who will never see this post or explaination and only knew that I got really weird at my own birthday circa 19#idk#its just one of those inherent traits to me forever and ever
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#I was just thinking about my boss's birthday is on 4/20 and how annoyed she always is by the weed jokes#vs my friend who hates that their birthday is on nye#so I wondered if there was a public opinion on what the worst birthday is. I feel like Christmas is a bad one#but 9/11 is bad too for different reasons
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my mom literally trying to gaslight me in real time is sooo funny
#can i say quite literally the most cunty annoying thing in the entire world.#it is very frustrating to me that i send my birthday wishlist. a month before my birthday.#and everyone waits till the last week to get stuff. like.#i get my stuff for people 3 weeks before birthdays and christmas most of the time if they give me lists#and literally some ppl are shopping for me like 4 days before my bday and asking what i want#even though i already. sent a wishlist.#and i don't get it like#i never buy myself fun things bc i hate spending money#so i ask for fun silly stuff you have to buy online bc otherwise i'll never get it#and then they also never get it for me bc they never look at what i want until last minute#and i don't get it lol!!! makes me feel like no one actually wants to get me anything#and just does it out of obligation like#i care about getting stuff ppl want and making them happy#IDK I KNOW THIS SOUNDS SO CUNTY I SHOULDN'T COMPLAIN#THAT PPL WANNA GET ME THINGS AT ALL#it's just like. i care a lot about effort yenno.#SIGH WHATEVER. I JUST THINK IT'S FUNNY MY MOM TRIED TO GASLIGHT ME ABT THIS CONVO#i told her to tell my brothers gf not to get me x piece of dndads merch cuz tay wanted to get it for me#and that the gf could get me dragon age posters i put on my google doc#my mom comes back down says the dndads stuff wouldn't come by my birthday#and i said i literally told you to tell her not to get her that because tay wants to get me that#and she was like no you said the other thing#NO. I DID NOT. LOL.#AND THEN SHE ROLLED HER EYES AT ME WHEN I CORRECTED HER#like.............................................#ANYWAY. SORRY FOR BEING THE WORST MOST ANNOYING GIRL IN THE WORLD AND#EXPRESSING THE MOST GLARINGLY FIRST WORLD PROBLEM OF ALL TIME#i just want ppl to genuinely care about me on my birthday like sorry if that is too much to ask!!!#maia.txt
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A not very aesthetic photo set
but today was a good day
#I cleaned and bought a mini tree#I tried to buy a big tree but instacart refunded me and the money wonāt be back in my account for a few days š#Iām making some cinnamon rolls to surprise my boyfriend with!#his birthday is in a few days but Iām BROKE so heāll have to wait for Christmas for his gifts š#I also got a non alcoholic wine like drink and havenāt tried it yet but will report back#Iām feeling happy today#I hope my body continues to let me clean the house and cook like I have been#being productive feels so much better than rotting at my pc#I neeed to get out of this house though š#personal#nonsims
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